The story of the death of Sheryl Sandberg’s husband, Dave Goldberg has felt gut-wrenching to me all week. Sheryl is the COO of Facebook, and her husband Dave was the CEO of Survey Monkey. Dave died suddenly from falling off a treadmill while the family was on vacation. He was only 47 years old.
There’s the obvious devastation that he was so young and he and Sheryl were not only husband and wife with young children – but what really got me even more, is how the couple seemed to be best friends.
I put myself in that situation – although not yet married and without children, I can hardly breathe. I can’t imagine losing my own husband-to-be, Anthony. The thought of it is truly debilitating.
All I can choose to do is try and stay present and grateful for the partner my soul has chosen to spend this life with.
This gets me thinking about my own life and how love is a beautiful, crazy and unpredictable thing.
I always thought that when I met ‘the one’ that I’d be walking off the set of Oprah with my latest published book, launching my newest world changing social impact company, in the best shape of my life and financially free – and whatever else a perfect woman would look like to me at that time.
Except, when I met Anthony it was during one of the most difficult times in my life. I was a complete emotional mess, experiencing an identity crisis and because of this choosing to give up a business I had just worked tirelessly on for 5 years. I was sick with an auto-immune disease and had no idea (and wouldn’t for another couple of years), I would fall asleep all the time and just blame it on stress. I was sick, emotionally and financially depleted and trying to figure out just who I was supposed to be in this crazy world where your identity is established by what’s posted on your Facebook page.
Now I realize the truth; true love is not from the person who is just captivated by our successes, red carpet moments and the highlight reels of our best selves.
The real deal is that true love is the person who loves all of you. True love is the person who loves you through all your hardest and self-defining moments. True love is the person who you can be real and vulnerable with in those difficult moments in life. True love is the person who wipes our tears, rubs our backs and supports us through anything. The person who loves us through our imperfections, our real life issues, our makeup-less moments and all of our weaknesses – that is truly beautiful.
We are not just our best moments; we are humans with real human experiences, challenges and lessons. No one is exempt from this part of life. Life is full of ups and downs and growth and deep emotions. Honouring that as part of life makes us beautiful and leads to living in your most authentic life with the most deserving souls.
Let’s use this moment to honour the life of Dave Goldberg and the beautiful relationship he and Sheryl shared.
Life is uncertain.
Our journey here will end.
Staying awake to this reality may be the catalyst to living your truth and opening yourself up to the most real form of love.
Crack open to your romantic partners, best friends, family – whoever is there. The truest forms of love will always stay and support you.